Summer was going to drag by. Titus wished he’d been able to teach summer school; he’d have had something to help pass the time. As it was, he’d spent the week since he’d returned from the coast moping around like a lovesick fool. And he’d put off dinner with Stacy and Michelle; if he told them he was ill a second time, they’d show up at his doorstep.
The idea of spending an evening with them made his heart ache, and it also made him feel like the biggest asshole in the world, because he was envious of their relationship. He wanted that kind of bond… and he knew who he wanted it with.
“Stupid. Don’t be stupid.” Titus opened his eyes and gave the bridge of his nose a rest. He got up from the couch and stretched. Maybe he’d feel less moody if he actually left the house.
That meant showering first. Titus sniffed his pits. “Definitely showering.”
There was no point in sitting around feeling sorry for himself, or thinking he was heartbroken. That last one was stupid; he and Draven hadn’t even spent a full week together. It wasn’t like Titus loved him. That just wasn’t possible in such a short time.
I’m going to stop thinking about him. Just stop it, Titus. Stop the pity party and pouting and all the other crappy p-words that are downers. If he gave himself that lecture often enough, eventually it’d actually sink in.
Just like if he kept telling himself there was no way he could have truly fallen for Draven. It was only the sex, and the fact that Titus hadn’t had any involving someone other than himself in years.
And the reason for that didn’t bear thinking about. There was nothing Titus could do to change the past.
But I could stop letting it control my future.
Titus groaned and stripped off his clothes in the bathroom. He wasn’t in the mood for any deep thinking. He was just in a summer funk; that was all that was wrong with him.
He should be reveling in the adventure he’d had. Think about the good times, the sex, Draven…
“Fuck. Ugh!” Titus stepped into the shower and turned it on. The water was cold, but Texas was hot and Titus hadn’t bumped the AC down, so he was fine being pelted by chilled water.
He cleaned himself almost mechanically until he reached the lower part of his stomach. Then parts started tingling and images burst into his head like they’d been held back by a bungee cord that snapped.
Draven, kissing him, touching him, fucking him—and Draven smiling, scowling, laughing, leaning close to whisper in his ear, sharing touristy info and sexual innuendos.
And rather than becoming aroused, Titus’s mood plummeted. He missed Draven. Lying to himself about it wasn’t helping. Whether it was stupid or not, he missed the man.
That might have only been the case because Titus had been alone for so long. Not that he’d had options where he lived… the dating pool for him was borderline microscopic, and even Stacy and Michelle kept their relationship hidden.
Titus didn’t want to live like that, not if he found someone he loved.
But he hadn’t found that someone yet.
Yes you have.
“Shut up,” Titus muttered to the voice in his head. “I have not!”
He finished cleaning up then he turned the shower off. He hadn’t stopped thinking about Draven, but he was going to try to stop being so down about their fling coming to an end. They’d both agreed on what they’d done beforehand. Titus’d had no right to change the established rules even though he’d wanted to ask Draven if there was a way to make a relationship work. Although, Titus wasn’t sure he’d have actually been brave enough to speak up.
He walked into his bedroom, a towel around his hips. His phone screen was lit up, so he either had a missed call or a text. Or both.
Titus was betting on a text from Stacy. He really needed to get over himself and go see her and Michelle. Maybe he’d call her and offer to show up with pizza for dinner tomorrow. They could watch a movie and stuff themselves on cheesy, greasy goodness.
That’s what he’d do. Titus crossed over to his phone before he could change his mind. The screen went dark just before he got there, but he picked up his phone then tapped it.
And almost dropped it when he was the text.
Can I come talk to you?
Titus’s heart pounded so hard he halfway expected to keel over. He placed a hand on his chest as he reread the message from Draven. He hadn’t been able to delete Draven’s contact info, but even if he had, he would have known that number.
And though it was possible that he should have given the request some thought, Titus didn’t. He replied with Yes, of course. Would love to see you again. It was perhaps too enthusiastic, but it was still less than what Titus held back.
Draven answered him in seconds. I’m at the Holiday Inn. Be there in five minutes.
“Here?” Titus squeaked. “He’s already here?”
Is that okay? Draven texted.
Titus nodded then groaned because Draven couldn’t see him bobbing his head. He answered just as quickly with, More than okay.
Now all Titus needed to do was to decide on whether to open the door while wearing the towel, or while wearing nothing at all.
Because he wanted Draven, and yes, he wanted to talk to him, but first…
Yeah, but first--